Penis Numbing Spray: Is it worth it?

That terrible moment when she realizes that you came before you even put it in.

That terrible moment when she realizes that you came before you even put it in.

Are you a man that suffers from premature ejaculation? There’s no shame if you are because the FDA has just approved the first ever penis numbing spray. It’s called Promscent and it’s supposed to help you cope with premature ejaculation and possibly make your dick smell like prom.

The exact cause of premature ejaculation is unknown. It was once thought to be a completely psychological problem but recently doctors have determined that it’s caused by a mix of psychological and biological problems. Really though, it doesn’t matter what causes premature ejaculation because it sucks for everyone involved. Men get embarrassed and women are unsatisfied sexually. That’s why it’s our duty here at the Blog to investigate whether or not Promscent can really help with premature ejaculation.

Promscent‘s website instructs users to spray their penises 10 minutes before having sex and then rub the penis numbing spray into the penis’s skin. This process will not only give your dick some chubs, it will also allow the topical lidocaine to be absorbed through the skin and create the numbing effect. Lidocaine is a local anesthetic and is used topically to relieve itching, burning and pain from skin inflammations. Lidocaine is also often injected as a dental anesthetic or as a local anesthetic for minor surgery.

So it’s definitely going to make you a little numb…



The Cut‘s Josh Gondelman’s applied Promscent penis numbing spray onto his own penis to see how well it works. Here is his account of the using Promscent penis numbing spray:

I then spent the ten-minute “waiting period” uncomfortably checking my e-mail. Finally, after fifteen or so years as an amateur, I was ready to become a professional masturbator. Unfortunately, I’d been overzealous with the Promescent. I could barely muster the kind of erection you might get after several tumblers of hard alcohol. The problem wasn’t numbness so much as anhedonia of the genitals. Masturbating felt like listening to a Phish song; I was ten minutes in with no end in sight, just a lot of aimless noodling. After twenty fruitless minutes, I gave up, limp from exhaustion and local anesthesia.

The next day, I got “back to work” using only three spritzes. Though it diminished the sexual sensation, the lower dose made pleasuring myself feel less like a Sisyphean chore and more like eating the last piece of pizza just because it’s there. After eleven minutes, I finally finished my pizza. I’d call it a “climax” in the same way that crossing “wash dishes” off your to-do list is the “climax” of washing dishes.

And that’s just the solo session. Wait to you hear how he describes sex with Promscent penis numbing spray:

For the sake of research, we tried once more. This time I doused myself as if it were bug spray and my penis was on a journey through the rain forest. Once again, I’d overdone it. It was the most nerve-racking, cerebral sex since I lost my virginity. Thanks to the double-bagging (technical term) effect of liquid-condom sensation and actual condom, I felt next to nothing. Well, that’s not entirely the case. With my brain free from experiencing pleasure, I became acutely aware of how sweaty I was.

Based on this impartial account of Promscent penis numbing spray, it probably will help a man suffering from premature ejaculation to maintain his load during sex. However, there is no regulated dosage, which Mr. Gondelman pointed out can lead to over-numbness. Finding out what the right dosage is seems like an impossible task unless you’re anesthesiologist.

Premature ejaculation is a problem but Promscent penis numbing spray is just snake oil. It’s a quick fix that won’t actually help you overcome your problem. And plus, Promscent penis numbing spray is super expensive. A standard bottle of Promscent penis numbing spray costs $79.95. And for some reason, they advertise the fact that it comes to $2.66 per use. Am I a cheap SOB or does that seem expensive?

If you suffer from premature ejaculation, don’t spend $79.95 on Promscent  penis numbing spray. Try masturbating before you have sex (or just more in general). Try to relax your butt muscles during sex (it works!). Applying a penis numbing spray should always be a last resort. At least when you’re prematurely ejaculating, you still feel something. What’s the point of even having sex if you can’t feel it?

via The Blog

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